Thanks, Dad, For All The Great Advice

Mr. Patch Editor's Dad never hesitated to pass along nuggets of wisdom.

I never hesitated to appear to ignore them.

It wasn't out of disrespect. Nor was it from a lack of appreciation. In fact, I listened to everything he preached.

But I never wanted him to know it. Back in the day, my dad and I were so different. He was country, and I was the city (well, suburbs, at least). He was Larry Bird, I was Gary Patyon. He was Kenny Rogers while I was more Notorious B.I.G.

You get my drift. He and I seemed so different that no one could know how much I looked up to him. So, I just rolled my eyes and pretended not to care about his advice.

This Father's Day, I'm here to say that I listened to all of it. I soaked it up like paper towels on a spill. It was funny as you-know-what, too.

And as ode to me Dear Old Pappy, I will share some of my favorites. It's a Hall of Fame, in some sense. Here they are, in no particular order (or in some cases, sense):

• "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush": This was my favorite of many old-timey sayings that predated the 1950s. I found out that it means something along the lines of playing it safe and not being greedy, which may explain why Dad calls it a day after being down $10 at the $3 black jack table. Also, his preferred currency, at least in conversation, was "a bit." If someone can explain to me what that is, I'd appreciate it.
• "Let's eat some cabbage salad": Say what you will, but Dad is a pretty fit guy. He played sports and jogged and swam and, of course, ate right all of his life. Even into his 70's, the guy still has a wood business in which he chops pieces of firewood and kindlings to sell in bundles to the local hardware store. Way to make me feel 20 years older, Old Man.
• "It's not worth it": Dad's not a fighter. He used to box a little bit, but never just for the sake of fighting. He never picked a fight, and he never accepted when presented with the option. Some might have chosen otherwise, but he always told me to remember that stepping away from a fight guarantees you the option to live another day. He might have also just stressed this to me because I'm 5-foot-7.
• "Who cares what people think of you": Dad was never one to keep up with the Joneses. Or the Smiths. Or the Cruzes. Or the Takahashis. Or anyone else for that matter. A dashing Englishman himself, he never cared about what people thought of his appearance. That ran in stark contrast to my mother, who spends an hour in front of the mirror before a 5-minute trip to McDonalds and back.
• "Settle down": For all the time I've known him, Dad has never really lost his head. Notice I didn't use the term "cool," which would require him to be cool in the first place. But he never lost his temper or blew a gasket. He was always even-keeled. Well, until he reached retirement age. Now he gets a little chippy when watching the news and yells at the television. He says it's politics, but I chalk the change up to him being a grandfather and losing $10 at black jack.

Those are a few of the things that somehow helped guide me throughout life. Laugh if you must, but I swear Dad might be a modern-day Aristotle or Buddha. In any case, I want to let him know that I listened (and laughed) each time, and I want to wish him a Happy Father's Day.

Your advice was valuable stuff, but I can't tell you how many bits it's worth.